A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must be an engineer" says the balloonist.
"I am" replies the man. "How did you know."
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but it's no use to anyone."
The man below says "you must be in management."
"I am" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault."
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Fall was upon a remote reservation when the Indian tribe asked their new Chief what the coming winter was going to be like. The modern day Chief had never been taught the secrets of the ancients. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.
Better safe than sorry, he said to himself and told his tribe that the winter was indeed expected to be cold and that the members of the village should stock up on firewood to be prepared.
After several days, our modern Chief got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"
"It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold," the meteorologist at the weather service responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again. "Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?"
"Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find. Two weeks later the Chief called the National Weather Service again. "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely," the man replied. "It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever."
"How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy."
The man below says: "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must be an engineer" says the balloonist.
"I am" replies the man. "How did you know."
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but it's no use to anyone."
The man below says "you must be in management."
"I am" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault."
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Fall was upon a remote reservation when the Indian tribe asked their new Chief what the coming winter was going to be like. The modern day Chief had never been taught the secrets of the ancients. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.
Better safe than sorry, he said to himself and told his tribe that the winter was indeed expected to be cold and that the members of the village should stock up on firewood to be prepared.
After several days, our modern Chief got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"
"It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold," the meteorologist at the weather service responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again. "Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?"
"Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find. Two weeks later the Chief called the National Weather Service again. "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely," the man replied. "It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever."
"How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy."
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A city boy, Raju, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for Rs 100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died last night."
Raju replied: "Well then, just give me my money back."
The farmer said: "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."
Raju said: "OK then, just unload the donkey.."
The farmer asked: "What ya gonna do with him?"
Raju: "I'm going to raffle him off." (Note: To raffle is to sell a thing by lottery - draw lot - to a group of people each paying the same amount for a ticket)
Farmer: "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"
Raju: "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead."
A month later the farmer met up with Raju and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?" Raju: "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two rupees a piece and made a profit of Rs. 898.00."
Farmer: "Didn't anyone complain?"
Raju: "Just the guy who won. So I gave him back his two rupees."
The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died last night."
Raju replied: "Well then, just give me my money back."
The farmer said: "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."
Raju said: "OK then, just unload the donkey.."
The farmer asked: "What ya gonna do with him?"
Raju: "I'm going to raffle him off." (Note: To raffle is to sell a thing by lottery - draw lot - to a group of people each paying the same amount for a ticket)
Farmer: "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"
Raju: "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead."
A month later the farmer met up with Raju and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?" Raju: "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two rupees a piece and made a profit of Rs. 898.00."
Farmer: "Didn't anyone complain?"
Raju: "Just the guy who won. So I gave him back his two rupees."
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